Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
