I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Randomize
