My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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