i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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