ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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