Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize
