I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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