how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize