Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
