I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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