As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
