dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I wish i was in the wii world.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
