apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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