I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I currently don't understand fingers.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
