a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i just had sex bonerless
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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