Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
