I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize