Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
