I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
