This is not my ceiling
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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