This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
