I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
