She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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