and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
