i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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