This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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