She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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