Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
