I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
