party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
