I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
