Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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