Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Sorry about my life...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
