there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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