Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You are the jesus of drinking
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
