Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
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