I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
