I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
