And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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