I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
