TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
