I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize