i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
