She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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