hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
