It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
