too bad you live with your parents still
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
