i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
