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• (913): View more from Kansas

  Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.

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• (858): View more from California

  It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (917): View more from New York City

  He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.

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• (805): View more from California

  Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?

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• (+52): View more from Mexico

  she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.

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• (760): View more from California

  Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.

  (818): View more from California

  That was one of the best texts I got today

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  How do you even...

  (770): View more from Georgia

  The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice

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