no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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