ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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