we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
