I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
